My life as an evacuee

I must say hurricane surviving...not one of my strong points. I mean, I'm fine, and it's not like it was a struggle to survive or anything, but I am cranky, hungry, and REALLY want to take a shower.

It all started Thursday I guess you can say. As my last entry said, I was really anxious about not wanting to stay in my apartment by myself. But I figured I would have to work, so I was not sure I had any other real choice (starbucks never closes)...but when I got to work on thursday my boss announced that we would in fact close so that we could evacuate or hunker down as needed. Traffic had been pretty bad all day with people evacuating from Galveston, but I made the judgement to pack up and go to my moms when I got off work (at 9:30 pm). So I went home and threw a few things into a bag, and Libby's bag. I figured I would be at my moms until sunday tops, and I highly doubted her power would go out (my mom lives in Tomball). Luckily I traveled at an odd time so the drive to moms was fine...I didn't even have to use my newly purchased EZ tag (I know I FINALLY got one, I got tired of fishing for quarters) the tolls were free. Libby was just excited to have someone who wouldn't tell her no (my mom never really mastered that)

So Friday we ventured out to get a few necessary groceries...it seemed at that point that everything would be closed by later that afternoon...it was CRAZY. And really hard to figure out things that could completely be made without refrigeration AND microwaves (even though I still didn't really thing we would loose power). I also took what turned out to be my last shower that day too :(.All day the news was talking about the winds and rain coming, but it remained sunny most of the day. I think the wind started to pick up around 7 or 8...but we started hearing reports of power going out in Houston, so I was beginning to think I was right as the count of people who were losing power went up I was more and more relieved at my decision to go to my moms. But at 11 the cable went out...I thought that was bad...then at 2:30 am we lost power. It's crazy all I can really say is I heard the wind and the rain, but in the process of avoiding windows (besides it wasdark outside so you couldn't see anything) I can only say what I heard and maybe felt...I was sure it was just a matter of time before a window shattered and a tree limb impaled me (I was sleeping on the couch in the living room, surrounded by windows). Libby slept through the whole thing. It was hard to sleep with the wind blowing so hard, and I kept seeing flashes of the transformers blowing...so finally I grabbed a blanket and headed to my moms closet with Libby, I'm not going to lie, probably one of the best decisions I have ever made. I slept through most of the remainder of the hurricane. It was still pretty windy when I woke up in the morning though. When the sun came up I was slightly surprised to see my moms yard mostly unscathed.

So, being that maybe I am high maintence, I was not having the life with no ac, or tv, or real food...and all over the news (well, on the radio) it was being reported that it was going to be weeks before power would be fixed. So I made the decision that I was getting out of town and heading for Ft. Worth. Maybe the fact that I couldn't keep a cell phone call should have been a sign that was a bad idea. I called Jenn to search for ways for me to get there and I packed my things and set out on the road. I probably got 2-3 miles away before I was stopped in my tracks because water was covering the road. So I returned to my moms, and started my work of convincing her that even if we had to go to brenham or austin that we HAD to get a hotel, that I would die if we didn't leave. So we called my sister so she could start calling around to find open hotels...but nothing, we returned home defeated and I took an ambian and went to sleep.

Again when we woke up on sunday I was a little disheartened because not even a block away from my moms house power was running...but we were sweating it out. The only thing worse was the news constantly telling me that thankfully a cold front was coming through and would be here tomorrow. Really!? We had started hearing rumors of resturants opening and my mom needed to get gas, so we ventured out again meanwhile my sister found a hotel room in Round rock and it was decided that once we returned home we would turn around and make our way to Austin...when I noticed I had a voicemail...so I checked it (which I almost NEVER do)...and it was Johnny (he is my moms uncle, I guess my grand uncle, my grandmoms brother) he happens to live just down the street from me, and had journeyed out on his own and noticed that my apartments had power. So here I am in my bed with electricity and the ability to write random blogs.

Unfortunatly my apartment does not have water pressure...but I guess you can't have it all. I'm also now on lock down due to the curfew...what the crap, I didn't even have a curfew when I was in high school.

when is it ok to panic?

So I am REALLY tired of the phrase "cone of uncertainty" you would think something like a hurricane impending could get a more serious name that doesn't sound like a magic trick circa 1900.

My normal cynical self is trying to tell myself that this is just like every other hurricane, all talk and nothing else...but my gut is telling me this might actually be a bigger deal. Everything in me is screaming evacuate. I want nothing more than to jump ship and even if I'm overreacting, say well better safe than sorry. But I have to work, tomorrow, friday and saturday...I don't think they will see it the same way. And I'm hoping they are right, I hope the news is making a bigger deal of this than it really is...but I'm really scared.

The part I'm most scared about is that if anything happens, I'm by myself. Well, Libby is here, but something tells me that she is not the most helpful in an emergency. I don't know where my flash light is, I don't have much food that doesn't involve a microwave, I don't even have neighbors...I think that is one of the things that scares me the most...that I am literally the only person who lives on my floor of my apartments... I can't even count on helpful strangers.

Please do not comment and tell me that "I'll be ok" or "they always make a bigger deal of these things than they really are" minimizing my anxieties will just make them worse.

I'm just frustrated...I hate the unknown...I hate that this time tomorrow I could be evacuating and I have no way to know...I'm going to be at work when the storm hits at this rate, I hate that I am going to be making stupid people coffee, who don't know that coffee during a hurricane not so much a priority. I hate that when I work friday I'm sure it'll be a onslought of people driving through on their way out of town...well I can't because I have to be there to give them coffee so they can leave but I can't. I'm totally a rather be safe than sorry person and it is killing me that I am going against my judgement to stay...

But at the same time I understand that the world can't close because there "might" be a storm in 2 days...and I remember just a month ago when "eduard" was the impending threat and it barely rained...I wanted to leave then too, so I'm just hoping I'm wrong again...I have never wanted so badly to be wrong.

blogs salad and irresponsibility

so I'm currently at one of may favorite establishments... Tossed enjoying a salad and blogging.

I STILL don't have internet at my new apartment, come tuesday maybe I will blog from my own house :). I don't have cable also reducing my possibilities of wasting time and not doing things I should (like unpacking). I wouldn't worry though, I have procrastinating down to an art. The only things that are unpacked are my clothes and the kitchen...all of which my sister did while I was at work.

I thought packing my life into boxes was anxiety inducing...I guess unpacking those same boxes has the same effect. I have all this space and I don't know how to use it. I am a creature of habit so I know where ever these items land is probably going to be where they stay for the remainder of my time in my apartment. I think I also know how I threw those same things into boxes just a week ago, and so with the opening of every box is a surprise and a moment of what was I thinking, like today I found that I decided that packing my dvds and towels together was a great idea. I actually remember and those items were 2 of the last things I packed as I got the call the movers were on their way so I tossed them in the box and declared I was done (that was a really bad judgement on my part).

I feel really bad...(ps this is a subject change). I got sent home from work today because I was sick...I really was sick...I kept throwing up, but I knew it wasn't contagious so I figured I could work through it. And now that I feel fine I feel really guilty like I should have stuck it out...I have this annoying quirk...If I worry about ANYTHING I get sick the next morning. I have gone to the doctor (although it had been a long time and I am considering going back) So what happened was it started with a headache. I had it yesterday but it wasn't a huge deal. I had agreed to take one of my former campers to a concert, and I was fine...I went home and my head started to hurt again, and I only had about 2 1/2 hours to sleep before I had to be at work. But I wasn't worried about the lack of sleep I had planned for this and had taken a nap yesterday afternoon to prepare...But as I was falling asleep I started to worry, just general normal stuff that is always on my mind...this is why I normally fall asleep watching tv...so I don't think about this stuff...And lo and behold 4:25 am I was throwing up (sorry if you don't like stories about throwing up) I took some medicine that is supposed to help, and went to work...thats what sucks about opening, you don't have the luxury of calling in or getting a shift covered. I figured I would put on my big girl panties and go...and that it would maybe even be better to go to work and get my mind off the fact that I didn't feel good. but an hour later I was back on my way home. I hate it though. I feel awful...Kendra who sent me home was also not feeling well, and she stayed and her shift was longer than mine to begin with. I just hate not being reliable. I hate feeling like I 'm being a baby. I hate that when I woke up at 10:30 I felt fine. I almost would have felt more justified in being sent home if I had felt bad the whole day...but this whole throwing up thing never lasts that long only until about lunch time...which is why I thought I should stick it out. I'm just tired of it. I want to worry like a normal person...it sucks because when I start to worry I think about the fact that I'm going to make myself sick...then I worry about that. Anyhoo Kendra if you are reading this thank you for sending me home I really appreciate it and I'm sorry that I'm a baby (maybe I can play with your new baby spud)