On the Ride

"Life has moments hard to describe
Feeling great and feeling alive
Never coming down from this
Mountain we're on

Always knowing we're gonna be fine
Feeling great and feeling alive
Never coming down from this
Mountain were on
The view is so clear
And it's crazy up here
Life is amazing with you on the ride"
On the ride- Aly and AJ

My facebook status says that I am studying...so clearly I am blogging.

Life has been so crazy lately. Right now the biggest thing is that I got my dream job. I am working for Texas Children's Pediatric Associates in Cinco Ranch. Basically, it's a pediatricians office associated with Texas Children' Hospital. But getting this job was no small feat. I think it was the longest interview process I have ever been through. OK, maybe it wasn't that long, but it feels like it took For-ev-er. It was all complicated by a phone call about 2 week ago. I got a call that I did not get the job. I was really disappointed but I got an offer to interview at the Katy office...so I went and did that interview. A week later they wanted me to meet with that dr. little did I know going into that meeting that I had already gotten the job, they just wanted us to meet before I started...it was funny because the dr. kept referring to "when you start" and what "we would do" and when I talked I was very cautious to say "if I get this job" but apparently I had missed the call offering me the job before I went int that morning for the meeting.

Anyhoo, I left there feeling good, but the Katy office never felt the same as the Cinco Ranch office. I thought there was nothing I could do about it, I was just going to have to get used to the Katy office, because as far as I was concerned Cinco Ranch was no longer an option. I liked the Katy office, it was just so much bigger (there are 5 dr's versus 3 in Cinco Ranch) and the Katy office is actually in a hospital while Cinco is free standing. So Wednesday afternoon, I was home relaxing, I had just finished my externship that morning, and since I didn't have a job I was taking advantage of the downtime. Around 3 I got the call, it was from the HR dept in Texas Childrens. So I answered and the girl started talking about offering me both positions. I was shocked and confused since like I said I thought Cinco ranch was no longer an option. She had gone into the spiel about benefits and
I was still stuck in my head on the fact that she said "both offices wanted to hire me" so finally I found a break in the conversation to ask about it. I asked "I'm sorry I'm just really confused right now, I thought I didn't get the cinco ranch job?" thats when she told me that they had offered the job to someone else but it didn't work out so they wanted me.

My pride was a little hurt by being the second choice...I was even tempted to take the Katy office for that reason but I thought about it more. The reason I was given about the Cinco office was that it was a new office and since I was new it would be a little harder to train me. So the more I thought about it, the more I realized it was good that I was the second choice, because, it makes no logical sense for them to hire me. I'm sure there were others that had more experience than me, thats not hard seeing as I have no experience. But they like me enough that they don't care and they are willing to take that chance on me. So, I took the Cinco Ranch position. I am really excited. Right now I am waiting for my criminal background check to clear before I can start working. So I'm enjoying a little vacay before my life is about to get crazy.

And thats pretty much where I am now, just waiting. I'm so happy about where my life is going right now. I am finally starting a career I love. I have my first 401k, I worked really hard and it's paying off that I got my dream job right out of school. I'm a little nervous that things are going to well. Part of me (the pessimistic part that is) is a little worried that if I am getting my dream job now, then where do I go from here. But I still want to go back to school to get my RN, so I feel like that leaves plenty of room for growth.

I really need to be studying for my certification exam. It's in the end of July, but I have already been out of school for a month and it's a little scary how much I have already forgotten. Especially now that I am in pediatrics, it's really important that I remember the normal ranges for adults...And the more specifics that I don't deal with everyday...the parts of the body...front office stuff...insurance. So I am trying to study now and just keep it all in my head instead of panicking and having to cram before the exam.

what a difference a little time makes

it has only been a little more than 2 weeks since I last wrote, but so much has changed.

The biggest thing being that I am no longer at the pediatric office. After much thought and consideration, the stress and anxiety it was giving me wasn't worth it. Plus I wasn't learning, I was sitting around stuffing envelopes and filling time because they wouldn't take the time to help me do things and it was easier to do it themselves (I feel like this is something I need to remember if I am ever a mom).

Now I am finishing the last 60 hours of my internship at a internal medicine doctor. It is like night and day. For one thing the demographic I tend to now is the geriatric crowd. I always said that I couldn't do it, and I do still think it would be hard, but at the same time yesterday I had a pt. (patient) that who made me laugh so hard. She was 80-something, and I was watching as someone else was taking her vitals. She kept looking at the girl and at me making faces. Then she proceeded to read a poster on the wall about hyperthyroidism and proceeded to tell us exactly why that sucks. Her and her husband were hilarious, and I'm not going to lie, made me a little jealous that my own parents or grandparents for that matter were nothing like that. I started thinking how fun it would be to have a mom like that...but that is a whole other blog I suppose. All of that to say I really like the office I'm at now. No, I don't think I want to stay here long term...as far as actual employees the dr. doesn't pay very well and does not offer benefits...but as far as experience this has been a much better one.

And if I took a job there I wouldn't be able to take a job with Texas Children's Hospital!!! OK, so I haven't been offered the job yet, but this last wednesday I had a second interview with them. I am REALLY excited and REALLY hope this works out. Just being in the office for the interviews, it just felt right, it's almost like this job was created for me, which is a little funny because it is a new position.

Which leads me to my other point of this blog. My life is so good right now. It's so crazy how drastically things have changed, I've learned to be at peace with myself, I'm doing something that I really love. I don't think even 2 weeks ago I could have said that. I think depression is something I will always struggle with...but I also think that I have finally reached the light at the end of the tunnel and I am ready to put this fight behind me. I hope this is not all circumstantial...I really don't think it is, but there is always that little bit of doubt that tries to sneak in and make me unsure of myself.

Sooo...with that said I think I am going to make another effort to find a church. This has been really hard for me...and even as I just typed that I am fighting the urge to delete it...because now that I have said it out loud (ok not outloud, but you know what I mean) I am accountable for it. I don't know why this has been so hard for me, but it has been. wish me luck.