So work day number 2 went alright. I am just frustrated. I guess when I decided to go into health care, I had this perception that you got to help people and feel good about that, and that everyone would act like adults to get whatever needed to be done...done. Well I was wrong. I expected there to be standards and red tape that would make things a little harder...but I think what is more frustrating is that none of that bothers me...it's literally the people I work with, and I have only known them for 2 days now.
I came into this knowing that Dr's are a bit cocky, and don't always work well with others, but I guess the point that bothers me is that they literally think they are too good to talk to the people working for them. Not one of the dr's I work with know who I am, I thought I had accomplished something when I smiled at one and got a half smile back. But when did that become ok...to treat people who are working their butts off for you like crap. I completely respect doctors, it's a hard job, a hard job I couldn't do, I guess I just come from the school of thought that it takes respect to get respect, not that I expect them to cater to me at all...but is it too much to ask to be treated like a human being?
What is worse is the other MA's. All they have on me is a few years experience...and one of them is on externship too, and just started last week...I can understand doing dirty work, it just bothers me when the one who just started last week does it to me, I mean she has to learn too. Today I she was told to go pick up a stool sample...she turned and asked me to go get it...I did it, I know better than to say no and honestly I really don't care about the dirty work, it's more the attitude that goes with it.
Later on today one of the MAs asked me if I knew how to do a vision and hearing test, I told her no...we hadn't really talked too much about that in school, but it's easy to pick up I knew just watching someone do it once would be fine. So she told me to go with the other extern and watch her so I could learn...cool, I like learning...so I left the room to find the girl I was to watch, once I found her she needed to go back in the office to get something, so I went with her...and the MA told her to make sure I watched how to do the tests...seriously, I was right there, she saw me, it's not like I disappeared to avoid it or something...I'm not a 3rd grader, I am in this externship to learn, why would I waste my time and their time goofing off? I understand not everyone takes things seriously, but give me a chance to prove I am trying before you start assuming you know me.
What makes all this worse, is that the MA that picks on me, for those of you who work at starbucks, think Ashley...but worse, has started making me nervous to the point that I mess up more when I'm around her because I am so scared. If she would just let me figure out what I'm supposed to do and correct me without making me feel like I'm the dumbest person ever for getting whatever wrong, she would see that I am smart, I am good at what I do, and I wouldn't make dumb mistakes.
People keep telling me to not take all this personally, that it's just the politics of a dr. office, but it's so hard for me, I take everything personally, especially when things are directed at me. I hate to say it, but I can't wait until we get another student, to take the pressure off me, but I would also like to prove that not everyone is like that...that I can treat someone who is in a position "below" me with dignity and respect remembering that we all make mistakes.
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
oh what a day...
So I am not prefacing the story, i know real weird for me.
OK, so as you know I got my extern assignment last week. I started today, the rest of my class started yesterday, but my site needed a day i guess to prepare for the fun that was going to hit them.
So being that I would be working in the med center I decided to take a test drive out there on Sunday, to figure out exactly where I was going figure out parking...etc. Well I found the hospital but I had no idea about parking. I wound up giving up and went home.
Yesterday (Monday) I started thinking that I was going to have to leave REALLY early to be sure about parking, so I called the Dr. to ask for clarification...again. When I talked to her she said a street and some landmark that really made no sense, but I thought maybe once I was there it would, so I made a second test drive...with no more luck and just as confused as ever I go home again. I was starting to have a sinking feeling that something wasn't right...why would the office tell me they were on memorial south...when Memorial doesn't even go to the med center...what brown building...and there is no free parking ANYWHERE near the med center, especially with no permit. I called my mom and decided maybe it would help if she drove me, then I could focus more on looking and not on traffic, and even run in the hospital and ask for direction if needed. So we venture down there a third time, I run in the hospital and hand the guy at the reception desk my paper with my assignment and ask him the best way to get there, he looked a little confused, and told me the suite they gave me was the mail room. So he needed more details to find where I belonged, details I didn't know, I didn't have a DR. name, or apparently an address, it was after 5 so when I tried to call to find out it went to an answering service. He traced the mail room number to an office, but it still wasn't making a lot of sense. I asked him about the mysterious free parking and he said for a fact that does not exist.
So I leave again, growing more and more frustrated that nobody knows where I go including myself. On the way home I was fighting crying...partially because I was hungry and tired and cranky, on top of all this madness. I start thinking I am REALLY uneasy about it all and felt like there was no way this could end well. So I decide I need to talk to the lady who coordinates our externships. But I don't have a phone number for her...that isn't her office. So I text another teacher, and she sends me her number...which is disconnected. I'm running out of options, so I get home and after some thought remember I am myspace friends with my teacher, so as a last resort I wrote on her wall to call me, but thinking she wouldn't check that. Well luckily she did, and she called me. I told her all that had happened, and she tells me to meet her in the morning at school because that really didn't seem right and she didn't want me to go all over town since it was her fault I had the mailing address.
So this morning I get there and let her call the dr. office (at this point I was already late, and I didn't want to be the one to tell them I was late already on the first day) Well, imagine both of our surprises when we find out I had been placed in HUMBLE...which is an hour from where I live, if not more. So she politely tells them that is not going to work and that I would not be the extern for them.
So at 8am I am sitting in her office, already a day behind on my externship realizing that it might be another day or 2 before I could be placed. BUT the good thing is that I was able to in a way pick where I would wind up...so clearly I said Katy, and in pediatrics. It's funny though because now I was a little disappointed because in fixing the disappointment from not getting peds to begin with I convinced myself that cardiology was a better specialty. Oh well.
So I had my first day at Katy Pediatrics. I LOVE LOVE LOVE pediatrics. One of the first patients I helped was a little girl with down syndrome, while the mom and the other MA were talking about symptoms and stuff I bent down and started playing with the little girl...when we were walking out of the room the little girl reached out for me, her mom said that was really unusual and that she must have liked me. Then I had to observe blood being drawn...while the MA was putting the tourniquite on to find a vein, the little boy (maybe 4yr old) started crying...next thing I knew I was tearing up while she started to draw the blood, luckily I was able to hide it. It was really funny because after a few people they let me start getting the patients on my own and doing vitals. I'm not going to lie, I felt so important, the moms would tell me the symptoms like I was going to turn and tell them what was wrong. The kids were on their best behavior...they thought I was cool.
However, I'm not sure how I feel about the office, I don't know if it's just that office or the nature of the job, but nobody seems that friendly, I seem to be the most outgoing, and I'm really not that outgoing...the other 2 MAs one seems nice and one does not. The one that does not seem nice would get mad at me for weird things, like she asked me to send a fax, so I did it, but the line was busy, so I kept trying, and she came out and was mad that it was taking me too long, but I can't control if the recieving party is busy. But I am a little relieved, because they seem to have plenty of MAs so I can't imagine that there is a possibility of being hired, and so that takes some pressure off, obviously I still want to do well because they will be a reference, but if today was any indicator, even if I am offered a position I do not think I'll take it.
Anyhoo, it's funny how I was all worked up last week and now I got exactly what I wanted to begin with...and it feels REALLY good to be doing something I really enjoy.
OK, so as you know I got my extern assignment last week. I started today, the rest of my class started yesterday, but my site needed a day i guess to prepare for the fun that was going to hit them.
So being that I would be working in the med center I decided to take a test drive out there on Sunday, to figure out exactly where I was going figure out parking...etc. Well I found the hospital but I had no idea about parking. I wound up giving up and went home.
Yesterday (Monday) I started thinking that I was going to have to leave REALLY early to be sure about parking, so I called the Dr. to ask for clarification...again. When I talked to her she said a street and some landmark that really made no sense, but I thought maybe once I was there it would, so I made a second test drive...with no more luck and just as confused as ever I go home again. I was starting to have a sinking feeling that something wasn't right...why would the office tell me they were on memorial south...when Memorial doesn't even go to the med center...what brown building...and there is no free parking ANYWHERE near the med center, especially with no permit. I called my mom and decided maybe it would help if she drove me, then I could focus more on looking and not on traffic, and even run in the hospital and ask for direction if needed. So we venture down there a third time, I run in the hospital and hand the guy at the reception desk my paper with my assignment and ask him the best way to get there, he looked a little confused, and told me the suite they gave me was the mail room. So he needed more details to find where I belonged, details I didn't know, I didn't have a DR. name, or apparently an address, it was after 5 so when I tried to call to find out it went to an answering service. He traced the mail room number to an office, but it still wasn't making a lot of sense. I asked him about the mysterious free parking and he said for a fact that does not exist.
So I leave again, growing more and more frustrated that nobody knows where I go including myself. On the way home I was fighting crying...partially because I was hungry and tired and cranky, on top of all this madness. I start thinking I am REALLY uneasy about it all and felt like there was no way this could end well. So I decide I need to talk to the lady who coordinates our externships. But I don't have a phone number for her...that isn't her office. So I text another teacher, and she sends me her number...which is disconnected. I'm running out of options, so I get home and after some thought remember I am myspace friends with my teacher, so as a last resort I wrote on her wall to call me, but thinking she wouldn't check that. Well luckily she did, and she called me. I told her all that had happened, and she tells me to meet her in the morning at school because that really didn't seem right and she didn't want me to go all over town since it was her fault I had the mailing address.
So this morning I get there and let her call the dr. office (at this point I was already late, and I didn't want to be the one to tell them I was late already on the first day) Well, imagine both of our surprises when we find out I had been placed in HUMBLE...which is an hour from where I live, if not more. So she politely tells them that is not going to work and that I would not be the extern for them.
So at 8am I am sitting in her office, already a day behind on my externship realizing that it might be another day or 2 before I could be placed. BUT the good thing is that I was able to in a way pick where I would wind up...so clearly I said Katy, and in pediatrics. It's funny though because now I was a little disappointed because in fixing the disappointment from not getting peds to begin with I convinced myself that cardiology was a better specialty. Oh well.
So I had my first day at Katy Pediatrics. I LOVE LOVE LOVE pediatrics. One of the first patients I helped was a little girl with down syndrome, while the mom and the other MA were talking about symptoms and stuff I bent down and started playing with the little girl...when we were walking out of the room the little girl reached out for me, her mom said that was really unusual and that she must have liked me. Then I had to observe blood being drawn...while the MA was putting the tourniquite on to find a vein, the little boy (maybe 4yr old) started crying...next thing I knew I was tearing up while she started to draw the blood, luckily I was able to hide it. It was really funny because after a few people they let me start getting the patients on my own and doing vitals. I'm not going to lie, I felt so important, the moms would tell me the symptoms like I was going to turn and tell them what was wrong. The kids were on their best behavior...they thought I was cool.
However, I'm not sure how I feel about the office, I don't know if it's just that office or the nature of the job, but nobody seems that friendly, I seem to be the most outgoing, and I'm really not that outgoing...the other 2 MAs one seems nice and one does not. The one that does not seem nice would get mad at me for weird things, like she asked me to send a fax, so I did it, but the line was busy, so I kept trying, and she came out and was mad that it was taking me too long, but I can't control if the recieving party is busy. But I am a little relieved, because they seem to have plenty of MAs so I can't imagine that there is a possibility of being hired, and so that takes some pressure off, obviously I still want to do well because they will be a reference, but if today was any indicator, even if I am offered a position I do not think I'll take it.
Anyhoo, it's funny how I was all worked up last week and now I got exactly what I wanted to begin with...and it feels REALLY good to be doing something I really enjoy.
Sunday, April 19, 2009
reflectation...
I'm sitting at home thinking. Libby is asleep next to me, I must have worn her out because she is not even distracted by the tapping on the keys on my keyboard.
Back to thinking...I know lots of things make me contemplate where my life is going...but I think this week is going to be a big one. I start my externship at St. Lukes on tuesday (don't worry, I got a crash course in EKG's last week, so hopefully I won't be clueless). My birthday is friday (no I am not turning 27, that is a dirty rumor, I am actually turning 26...again)...graduate may 1st...I'm sure the list goes much longer than that.
I am so excited at the prospects of starting my externship. It's driving me crazy that the rest of my class is starting tomorrow, but I don't start until tuesday. Normally I would be excited about a impromptu day off, but I am so curious about what all of this is going to be like that the anticipation in killing me. Especially now that I am in a different field than I intended. When I assumed I was going to be in pediatrics, I have been to several pediatrician appts. It's not even that different than a general appt for an adult, so I feel like I know what to expect. But the closest experience with a cardiologist I've ever had was when I was a nanny and Bailey had to see one before her heart surgery, but even then, I never went to the dr. with them, I just heard about it.
Today I did a test run to the hospital I'm going to be at, to see timing and have an idea where I am going...I'm even more nervous because I am working in the medical center and those of you familiar with Houston, that is one crazy area. There is nowhere to park without paying (which I really hope St. Lukes pays for my parking because if not, it's going to cost me $240 a month). I think I have a general idea where I'm supposed to go, but I'm still not sure, I decided that I am going to leave an hour earlier than I would normally so I can be sure to have that all worked out without risking being late. I'd much rather sit around there and be bored than to be stressing out in my car, and God forbid have to call to say I'm going to be late on my first day.
Back to thinking...I know lots of things make me contemplate where my life is going...but I think this week is going to be a big one. I start my externship at St. Lukes on tuesday (don't worry, I got a crash course in EKG's last week, so hopefully I won't be clueless). My birthday is friday (no I am not turning 27, that is a dirty rumor, I am actually turning 26...again)...graduate may 1st...I'm sure the list goes much longer than that.
I am so excited at the prospects of starting my externship. It's driving me crazy that the rest of my class is starting tomorrow, but I don't start until tuesday. Normally I would be excited about a impromptu day off, but I am so curious about what all of this is going to be like that the anticipation in killing me. Especially now that I am in a different field than I intended. When I assumed I was going to be in pediatrics, I have been to several pediatrician appts. It's not even that different than a general appt for an adult, so I feel like I know what to expect. But the closest experience with a cardiologist I've ever had was when I was a nanny and Bailey had to see one before her heart surgery, but even then, I never went to the dr. with them, I just heard about it.
Today I did a test run to the hospital I'm going to be at, to see timing and have an idea where I am going...I'm even more nervous because I am working in the medical center and those of you familiar with Houston, that is one crazy area. There is nowhere to park without paying (which I really hope St. Lukes pays for my parking because if not, it's going to cost me $240 a month). I think I have a general idea where I'm supposed to go, but I'm still not sure, I decided that I am going to leave an hour earlier than I would normally so I can be sure to have that all worked out without risking being late. I'd much rather sit around there and be bored than to be stressing out in my car, and God forbid have to call to say I'm going to be late on my first day.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
ok, now I'm excited...
I knew from the time I wrote my last blog that I was going to regret it because I would wind up being fine with the new plan. Well things have turned out quite well...
Ok, so when I wrote the day before, I only "unofficially" knew about my extern assignment. I had been told since I hadn't gotten either of my preferences to avoid a huge disappointment when I didn't get what I wanted, which is good, because I would have been quite shocked.
So yesterday I got my folder with my actual assignment I was kinda bittersweet, because I was still a little sad that I wasn't going to be in pediatrics, but I was curious about where I was ending up, especially because I knew it was in the med center (she gave me the zip code so I could make sure it wouldn't be too far).
When I opened my folder it said "St. Lukes Episcopal Hospital" then "Cardiology" I was stuck on the St. Lukes part...I was placed at a hospital. We have been told since day 1 that we would not be placed in hospitals, the contracts were few and far between, MA jobs in hospital settings are rare...even though for the MA they are pretty much the best job you can get. They have better benefits, better hours, better pay...they will even pay for nursing school...which was always in my plan, but a few years down the line. Granted I do not have a job yet, and this may not turn into one, who knows, but if this does, I will have a hospital job right out of the gate...making nursing school a lot more realistic in my future.
It is just humbling to me that I wanted so much less for myself, and was upset that I hadn't gotten what I wanted. I guess in my mind I was just being realistic, it's virtually unheard of to get a hospital job right out of school. I do still have little pangs of sadness, because I really want to work with children, but I feel more confidant in the plan that is being set in motion now. It's just cool to have a real tangible story of when God has more for you than you can even expect or imagine.
Ok, so when I wrote the day before, I only "unofficially" knew about my extern assignment. I had been told since I hadn't gotten either of my preferences to avoid a huge disappointment when I didn't get what I wanted, which is good, because I would have been quite shocked.
So yesterday I got my folder with my actual assignment I was kinda bittersweet, because I was still a little sad that I wasn't going to be in pediatrics, but I was curious about where I was ending up, especially because I knew it was in the med center (she gave me the zip code so I could make sure it wouldn't be too far).
When I opened my folder it said "St. Lukes Episcopal Hospital" then "Cardiology" I was stuck on the St. Lukes part...I was placed at a hospital. We have been told since day 1 that we would not be placed in hospitals, the contracts were few and far between, MA jobs in hospital settings are rare...even though for the MA they are pretty much the best job you can get. They have better benefits, better hours, better pay...they will even pay for nursing school...which was always in my plan, but a few years down the line. Granted I do not have a job yet, and this may not turn into one, who knows, but if this does, I will have a hospital job right out of the gate...making nursing school a lot more realistic in my future.
It is just humbling to me that I wanted so much less for myself, and was upset that I hadn't gotten what I wanted. I guess in my mind I was just being realistic, it's virtually unheard of to get a hospital job right out of school. I do still have little pangs of sadness, because I really want to work with children, but I feel more confidant in the plan that is being set in motion now. It's just cool to have a real tangible story of when God has more for you than you can even expect or imagine.
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
dissapointment
call me a spoiled brat...but I'm upset...I didn't get what I want.
So as most of you know, this week I am finding out my assignment for externship (read as I am finding out the person I am going to be working for, for free for a month). Anyone who has even heard of me knows that I want to work in pediatrics, that is the only reason I even got this degree, working with kids is what I have wanted to do with my life pretty much from the time I stopped being a kid myself.
Well, although I still don't know my actual site yet, I won't until tomorrow, I did find out the specialty I will be in...cardiology...I'm not even good at cardiology, I can't read an EKG, cardiology was my first "b" in school. I am trying to look on the bright side, cardiology is a very technical field, and she wouldn't have placed me there if she didn't think I was capable, but...it just upsets me that all I have wanted was peds, and in fact when asked when asked what I didn't want to do...I said geriatrics...what part of the population would you say mostly goes to a cardiologist???
Just to explain the process a little, a few weeks ago we were asked to fill out a paper with 3 preferences of field and area of town. I'm a reasonable adult, I was aware I may not get my first choice in either category...but I didn't get anything I even remotely wrote down in either category. for field I said 1) pediatrics 2) family medicine (pretty much a normal dr. office) or 3) OB/GYN for area of town I put katy, memorial or sugarland...but I got a cardiologist near the galleria I think, I'm still not real sure where exactly I'll be. I just know it's towards down town...the OPPOSITE of where I wanted. I'm frustrated because I don't understand why I even filled out any preferences when they were just going to do what they want anyway. I hate traffic...I hate cardiology...and right now I hate my life... maybe I should just stay at starbucks at least I'm good at that :(
So as most of you know, this week I am finding out my assignment for externship (read as I am finding out the person I am going to be working for, for free for a month). Anyone who has even heard of me knows that I want to work in pediatrics, that is the only reason I even got this degree, working with kids is what I have wanted to do with my life pretty much from the time I stopped being a kid myself.
Well, although I still don't know my actual site yet, I won't until tomorrow, I did find out the specialty I will be in...cardiology...I'm not even good at cardiology, I can't read an EKG, cardiology was my first "b" in school. I am trying to look on the bright side, cardiology is a very technical field, and she wouldn't have placed me there if she didn't think I was capable, but...it just upsets me that all I have wanted was peds, and in fact when asked when asked what I didn't want to do...I said geriatrics...what part of the population would you say mostly goes to a cardiologist???
Just to explain the process a little, a few weeks ago we were asked to fill out a paper with 3 preferences of field and area of town. I'm a reasonable adult, I was aware I may not get my first choice in either category...but I didn't get anything I even remotely wrote down in either category. for field I said 1) pediatrics 2) family medicine (pretty much a normal dr. office) or 3) OB/GYN for area of town I put katy, memorial or sugarland...but I got a cardiologist near the galleria I think, I'm still not real sure where exactly I'll be. I just know it's towards down town...the OPPOSITE of where I wanted. I'm frustrated because I don't understand why I even filled out any preferences when they were just going to do what they want anyway. I hate traffic...I hate cardiology...and right now I hate my life... maybe I should just stay at starbucks at least I'm good at that :(
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
a day in the life
this is how Libby tries to get me to rub her tummy when I am trying to sleep, you can't tell but now that she is in position, she is going to start hitting me with her paws and pushing herself more into my face so I can't ignore her.
it always takes a little motivation of reading my friends blogs to encourage me to update my own. That and my new and improved lack of sleeping pattern.
I have played with the idea of making a video blog for fans of Libby, but it's too good of an idea for me to waste on doing it 2-3 times and then abandoning it. Plus Libby is lame on camera, it's like she knows when I am recording and just sits there. It would be more awesome if I had video editing skills but I don't so don't hold your breath on that one. Right now she is laying down at the foot of my bed, but I'm not falling for it, the minute I lay down to sleep she will start jumping in my face, pulling my hair growling biting and trying to force me to pet her...you can ask my sister (all maybe 3 of you that read this and maybe know her).
I am the happiest girl right now...because...I have 6 days left of school. Can you believe it? I can't...this time next week I'll be finding out where my externship is exactly, finishing my last venopunctures (blood draws), and vital signs. I have found out that I will most likely be in a pediatric office in Katy, and right now the market is looking good as far as getting hired on after, or even having the choice to get another job instead of settling for the sake of getting a job. I can't believe that almost 8 months ago I had basic medical knowledge, but now I am comfortable poking people with needles, drawing blood, explaining procedures. This time in some ways seems slow, it feels like I've been in school forever...but at the same time it has moved so fast that I am slightly shocked that I am qualified to even be a MA. Although this last month of night school is killing me, as far as my class is concerned it was a good decision to switch, I get a long with them much better, it's more laid back, the teacher always tells us they are losers, which makes me sad that I got lumped into that before. I just am not good at regulating my sleeping, now I come home from school somewhere around 11, I eat something, and then by the time I wind down to fall asleep it is 3-4 am. I don't have to be at school until 6pm, but it makes me cranky when I sleep until 10-11am because I wake up feeling like I missed a portion of the day.
I wish I had more funny anecdotes or something, but my life is fairly boring for now...with the exception of Libby.
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